maybe mezzo

 Early August 2021 It has been nearly a month since my freshly squeezed sample has been sent off and I decide to ring the doctor to see if she has had results. No mean feat at the moment. I am assuming that 'no news is good news'. This request involves me getting past the triage stage but thankfully the Dr rings me and reads out the letter, of which I should have had a copy apparently. There is nothing in the histology, all 'normal', nothing except 'benign' scattered all over the letter and just the confirmation that one duct is over enlarged. I ask for a copy of the letter to be emailed but it seems emails are not safe enough (but the online form where you need to report all and sundry in order to get to the Dr seems to be ok!) and I receive some kind of strange gateway to get to it which I cannot access. Finally a receptionist DOES email it to me! More appointments will be set up and from being somebody who has not been to a Dr in the last 10-15 year...

In early July 2021 I am in the local surgery, with my Doctor examining my left breast after I had reported a couple of months of occasional blooded discharge found in my bra; just a spot you understand, every 10 days or so, but concerning. During Covid times, just getting a Dr appointment is a major success, but it is amazing what effect the words 'blood' and 'nipple' can bring about. So here I am half naked on her couch. Her concern strengthens when she feels some 'lumpiness'. With my family history of breast cancer, she decides to fast track me into the system, while reiterating that this is not because she thinks it is cancer. I leave reeling. My world has just changed. An agonising two weeks passes and the hospital appointment letter and enclosed documents do nothing to alleviate my anxiety, in fact they make me face what I am trying to ignore. But there they sit, staring at me. As a positive and usually health person, this knocks me for six.  I am a 62 year...

  NIPPING WEDDING DAY NERVES IN THE BUD Wedding nerves - we all get them. Mostly because we are aware of the importance of this life changing moment which is being witnessed by so many people we care about. If you  are not used to being the centre of attention (and in truth, even if you are), this can be quite unsettling.  Once you get to the day itself there is a 'no turning back' air to it. The ball has been set in motion and the day can feel as if it is running away from you. So how can we turn those nerves into excitement and help us move forward on such grand occasions? As a professional performer I have had many high pressure occasions to deal with, but nothing prepared me for feeling nervous on my own wedding day! I did, however, have strategies I could use, so here are my 5 top tips for calming nerves on the day. 1. Although you may be centre of attention, you are going to feel fabulous in your outfit. You have chosen something that suits you and yo...

What qualities can you think of that a Celebrant needs to bring to the table? Although initially the role of a wedding celebrant seems markedly different from that of a funeral celebrant, I would suggest that some qualities are universal. The first thing that always comes to mind, and this is more a way of being, is a love of people . A fascination for how we all interact. What is the spark that enables us to connect with one another? To engage with that in your everyday life is certainly a prime quality for Celebrancy. If you automatically enjoy the different ways of communicating, you will notice reactions and reach out to others. A desire to help others and make a difference is going to be a key asset. In either situation, you will be the main protagonist in the moment and everybody will look to you to lead the way - through the structure of the ceremony and the way it is conducted. And here is a big difference between other ceremonies and a Celebrant led one - the a...

  How can I cope with my nerves on the day? This is such a common worry for many people. I mean how often do you really have to be on show so evidently and speak clearly in front of a whole room of people when you are feeling emotional? Your wedding day is one such occasion and can cause sleepless nights leading up to the event. First of all, use a resource you have available to you constantly - that of breath. It seems such a little thing to do, but focussing on your breath is a brilliant way to calm yourself. I'll let you into a secret - for all my high level performing experience, on my wedding day, I too was nervous as I walked down the aisle! So, actively breathe differently, and the first thing is to breathe out and expel some of that excess air you will have taken in! Then breathe for specific counts - in for 5 out for 10; increase that if necessary in for 8 out for 20 for example. you can  make up your own numbers, but the out breath needs to be lon...

  The first puzzle for many people is what exactly is a celebrant?! The word cropped up recently at the funeral of Captain Tom Moore when he had a celebrant led funeral, fantastically realised by Lucy Silous. Traditionally, a celebrant used to be the alternative to a religious ceremony and 30 years ago that tended to be a Humanist ceremony. The legacy of this remains and when I said I was training to be a celebrant, the word 'humanist' cropped up every time. So let's clear this up. An independent celebrant is free from traditional religion, is not a Humanist and is not the same as a Registrar, which is the other confusion. If a couple choose to marry with a celebrant present, they must understand that a celebrant can not yet legally marry a couple, so this has to be done through the registrar, maybe a day  or two before the main day takes place. This can be literally the signing of the document and saying 'yes' to questions. The vows and the ring exchange are not le...